Group: Men Against Men in Womens Bathroom---Artifact

I needed a reason to be nice. Needed to rise from the baptismal font sparkling with redemption and walk among men while still remaining clean. They said I was a mama's boy. Too obedient for a 5th grader. Truth of the matter was, I was scared shitless of my mom. I've never seen a woman so terrifying in my life, and dude, I've seen a hell of a lot of drunk sorority girls. At first, she beat the cross into me, with her pedicured nails. And when I learned to bear the gravity of other peoples stares, and I began to wear the cross on my own.

So I used holy water to wash the faults of others from my eyes. I needed to be born again and see the power in the way that god made the world. And the ways that humans corrupted his perfection. Started seeing eye to eye with god. That I didnt need weed to be uplifted. To see the beauty in the way god naturally made me.

Dudes at church just seemed to get it. The brotherhood we gained by embracing our natural selves. We all knew how to spout hollow air bubbles like we were still holding our breath under that water. And church girls were cute you know, because of their innocence. I didnt want them to lose that. I could feel it draining out of my mother the first time she hit me. I wanted to show women how to act. That they shouldnt beat their children. They need to be reminded to baptise with water and not bruises. Thats why I wanted to be with them. Women, that is. Women need a man like me in their life. To show them how to be innocent. And church girls are used to getting down on their knees every Sunday. They've had practice at bending down to men. And hey, I wanted to go to heaven, right? But if I couldnt be god, I atleast wanted to be godlike. Have a virgin mother of my own. But I dont want my kid to have two dads. To be confused about what parents are supposed to look like. One mother, one father. Anything else is an abomination. Atleast californians get it.