Politics Post

G1-They’re accusing us of being homophobic?
G2-Lets think. Homophobic would imply that we are homophobes and homophobes suffer from homophobia meaning scared or fearful of homosexuals!!
G3-This is America, Come on No One is scared of fags!!
G4-No the proper term is Gay.
G1-No i thought it was Quire!
G2-Its homosexual, the proper term is homosexual. Okay like i was saying no one is fearful or scared of HOMOSEXUALS. We have one of the most liberal, unbiased, pride supporting magazines in this damn country.
G4-And we have rainbow assorted life savers at the front text. We hired all those international relations boys, and I'm pretty sure they have some sugar in their tanks.
G1-And those fashion hussies! They probably all have gay best friends, I heard fag hags are the 2009 club accessories.
G2-Well lets be politically correct. None of these things prove that we don’t portray a homophobic image. Just because we may be in relations to a gay person...< /span>
G3-I mean who isn’t?
G4-Exactly
G2-Like i was saying, just because we may be relations or in acquaintance with homosexuals does not mean we do not add to this stigma or idea of our magazine being homophobic!
G3-Okay lets pull out the books.
G2-Yes!
G1-Okay lets look it up.
G3-Get the stacks from the archives and every feature paper from the last 2 years!!Every-time the term, gay, homo, Quire, and fag, or hate crime come up high light it!
G4-GOOD IDEA!
G3-Okay!
(searching, high-lighting, reading, minutes pass)
G3-ALL DONE?
G4-Yes,
G2-Yes,
G1-Yea, I'm done.
G3-Okay I don’t have anything. G4-Me either.G2-I don’t have an ything either.
G1-Umm.. I think I found one, Lewis Anthony was beat to death on HighLander Park. Police classifies this high-school student’s death as a hate crime. February 6, 2008
G3 and G4-Ohh.
G2-So in the the last past two year the only thing we have on homosexuality is 1 documented hate crime?
G1-Well we’re definitely not homophobic
G1-Ohh no we’re not, we’re naive, unfair, pre-justice, and maybe even discriminatory, but not homophobic.
G4-Also we must not look over the fact that homosexuals are the minority. Sort of like the Indians and Blacks, and in order for this paper to sell we must cater to our mass majority, the main buyers, the popular demographic and thats that!
G3-Noone wants to hear about gays just as much as they don’t want to hear about the latest hip-hop song.
G2-MmmmHmmm
G1-I’m mean Discriminatory. G3-But not homophobic.

Fashion Group Response

G3: Girl, take this memo, I’m fixing my mascara (looking into the compact mirror. G1 takes memo)

G1: Wait- this says that the paper is getting accused of homophobia!

All: Oh my god!

G2: Homo-what? I love the homos. They have great style!

G3: Homophobia?! Damn it we work with them all the time! How are they going to accuse US?

G1: yea, I don’t know where they get that idea! Have they even taken a peek at our designers?

G3: All gay, except for that one guy, you know the one with the muscles and that sexy tattoo on his left bicep?

G2: nope, I’m pretty sure he’s gay. My gay-dar beeped hysterically the first time he gave me advice on how to apply my sparkly green eye shadow. The nerve of this man!

G1: Yea and most of our followers are gay. If that was the case, Perez Hilton wouldn’t read us. Our section got a bangin’ review on his blog just last week.

G2: Don’t forget, we got five stars.

G1: We better not lose them.

G3: Ok, then go email him and let him know we, the fashion dynasty, are NOT homophobic. We need to not mess up these ratings!

G1: And if he doesn’t respond,

ALL: OH MY GOD

G4: you really think he do that?

G3: He knows better. We can just throw a spread together, and this fiasco will be over.

G2: Then let’s feature a famous gay designer or mogul.

G4: we just did a feature with Ms. J! I just wrote it. We can’t do one again.

G2: do you have a better idea?

G4: Maybe write an article highlighting our past editions with all the gay brilliance in the fashion world!

G2: Well then start that. I’ll go email Perez.

Sports Writers Attire

We were thinking sports jackets over out white button ups.

With jerseys underneath button ups just in case we would get an opportunity in a scene to show how sports to the core we are.

also could do sports ties.

Sports Section: Sports Plug

W: Intercepted
D: whats the games plan??
J: *reads the assignment* something bout a football player….
W: fumble… gets concussion
D: RECOVERY! Dancing with the stars?
W & J: Huh.
D: How we gonna tackle this?
J: Well whats the play?
*starts drawing on playboard*
W: We need strong D
J & D: No homo
W: Well ho bout dancing with the stars, he on this season
J: I said no homo
D: yeah, we’ll leave that wide open
J: What if his wife has the details?
D: I’ll stick her
J: huh?
D: what? She’s in my hall of fame!
W: alright boys! Huddle up! Look we’re the returning conference room champs
J: yeah! the other sections are just hot dog vendors and foam fingers
W: they’re only their so men can take their sports section into work
D: they should retire! They couldn’t even follow through with the assist!
J: And look at them! They’re not even in a huddle!
J: Who even reads… world news?
W: this is America!
D: ¡GOL!
J: WHOAH! INSTANT REPLAY
*SLOW*
W:ttttthhhhiiiiiisssss iiiiiisssssss aaaaaaameeeeerrrrriiiiiccccaaaaa
D: ¡GOOOOOOOOOOL!
J: alright, break on three! 1…2…3..
All: break
W: but wait!
D & J: WHAT?!W: Get me an angle!

Sports Section: Reaction to Homophobia Memo

D: whoah! Out of bounds!
J: what? what?
D: they say we’re homophobes!
W: who? The fans or the refs!
D: the fans! They’re getting riled up!
J: we have to get them behind us!
*drifting pause of seriousness*
W & D: No Homo!
D: I just don’t understand where they’re getting this from!
W: yeah! I have a gay friend!
J: I have a gay neighbor!
D: I went to a gay bar once!
W & J: what?
D: I thought The Ramrod Inn would have lots of women
W: Okay…
J: My uncle dated a man once
W: Yeah what happened to him?
J: I don’t know, my mom said he went into the closet and hasn’t come out since
D: so you haven’t talked to him?
J: no apparently he doesn’t have service in there
W: or maybe he has really good service!
D: he he he he he he
W: oh! And last month I went to a musical with my wife!
J: yeah! theres lots of gays in musical!
D: Exactly, we aren’t homophobic lots of gays read our fashion section
J: yeah and I’m always nice to all of the dudes from the style editorials
D: and we love lesbians
All: lesbians…. yeaaaaah
W: yeah! and I went to lunch one time with ugh... steven… isn’t that his name
J: yeah isn’t he gay?
D: he definitely is! He’s always wearing that maaaanpurse!
W: yeah apparently his man purse was empty cause he asked me if I had any condoms after lunch and I said…NO!
J: I think somebody wanted a homer
W & J: d…..d…..d……d
All: DUNK
D: see we’re not homophobic! We include them in our conversations!
W: we don’t go round reporting when football players touch asses and hike balls in the locker room
J: and hey, we don’t complain when they are showering each other with a little love after they score
D & W: no homo
J: we just report the stats, the bedroom numbers are off limits
W: as long as their choices don’t affect the way they play – we don’t say a word
D: exactly! We’re just like the military
J: don’t ask don’t tell
W: that’s the best play

Response to Homophobic Accusations Memo
Nat: My word! This is absurdity!
Eric: What has gotten your caviar, so tightly packed?
Nat: If you could believe this. Our beloved institution is being accused of homophobia.
Elton/Eric: MY WORD!
Elton: It surely could not have come from our department.
Nat: The memo does not specify.
Elton: It must have come from somewhere much less cultured.
Eric: Where the job consists of watching an idol box all day and narrating what everyone else can clearly see.
Elton/Nat: Ha Ha Ha…sports.
Eric: We have never even had a typo.
Nat: Of course not…
All: We are World News.
Elton: Gentlemen we have a repetition to uphold.
Eric: We can’t lose our devoted readers.
Nat: They need us too much.
Elton: Who else will report to them what they are too impoverished to ever see.
Eric: Who else will enlightenment them whilst enhancing their vocabulary.
Nat: We will!
All: My word! We cannot let this happen. We have given the world too much to stop now.

Next scene prompt

When each section of the paper is told that the newspaper is being accused of homophobia, how do they respond?

example ideas:

World News - "nonsense. This is absurdity!"

Sports - "woah! out of bounds!"

Fashion - "Are you kidding? have you SEEN the designers?"

Politics - "Lets debate it..."

Whatever it is, they should be...offended. Betrayed their viewers, and determined to disprove this "myth"

I need each group to write the reaction scene. Write it as if another memo has been dropped off to everyone at the same time. It is a group scene, with each section reacting amongst themselves. After this, it is likely our 4 characters will begin to cross paths.

Go!

R

Politics--Scene

All: WE ARE POLITICS!

Jaz: We bring you your news
Ang- Your Booze
Mar+Gi- And give you the fight to choose
All: Mmmmmhhhhhh
Jaz: Between if the Mexicans are really to blame for the swine flu
Ang- If Bush is really smart
Gi- If Obama is really black
Mar- If the war in Iraq is really over oil
All: We stand for LIBERTY and expose all the injustices under the Red, White and Blue
Gi- Under the Oval Office table
Ang/Jaz- We inform you on which drain your tax payers dollars are going down
M-And the next Right you Americans will lose
All-Mmmmmmmhhhhh
GiGi(Really quickly)
Side effects may include:
intellectual disturbia
mental challenges
red diaper babies
prostitution rings
affairs with Monica Luinski
Flip Floppers
Bribery and Blackmail

Jaz- We interrupt all this red hairen with your next headline
Mar- Hey guys check this out Governor McGreery is resigning
Jaz/Ang- REALLY?
Gi- Isnt that the highly liberal governor who promoted same sex partnership and pro choice?
Jaz-Yeah, the same guy who advocated for stem cell research
Mar-New Jersey Governor is resigning after 4 years in office. Explanations of why have yet to be disclosed?
Ang- Hmmmm Which angle should we take on this one????


Wardrobe: Pencil skirts, white button up shirts, blazers and a brooch

International News - The Snobby Scene

Eric - Ahh, here we go gentlemen. We've gotten our new assignment: Carnival in Brazil.
Elton - Ah! I took my yatch out there once with my mistress.
Eric & Nat - Ahhh! That sounds very extravagant.
Elton - It was. There's nothing better than moving down the ocean's current, grabbing the sails, owning your manhood, basking in the sun's glory.
Nat - Let us incorporate that into this article.
Eric - Ah! So then we'll write this so well that Our avid readers will sell their shacks to experience this magnificence first-hand.
Nat - Ah! This reminds me of when I wrote the article on the running of the bulls in Spain.
Elton - Oh yes, that was a beautifully written piece.
Nat - At first I wasn't sure it would be, but as the bulls in their glistening splendor... Would you say they galloped or charged?
Eric - They stampeded.
Nat - Precisely, as they proceeded to stampede down the cobbled streets of Granada, a woman was caught in the action and her flailing figure swimming through the air (Eric does wave-like dance motions during this description)
Eric - Yes, truly a tragedy worthy of a Pulitzer.
Elton - The deadline might make capturing Carnival a challenge.
Eric - Don't worry. These dealines never outline the chalky ends to our words. They will be timeless in our print.
Elton - Because we're international news! There will always be a world... a world that needs news....
All - World News!
Nat - The only thing we need now is an angle.
All - Ahhhhh.... (In digression)